Today was my day off. I relish a free day when I can be off the grid, and spend the entire day online, lurking around on the internet and denying my inner geekness. (Confession: I'm ALWAYS online). I woke up late, and still wearing the lycra spandex leggings I slept in, scrounged around for food. I fixed some coffee with my SUPER AMAZING Keurig single cup coffee maker (IT'S LIFECHANGING!!!) and decided at some point I needed to get my ass up off the coach and go grocery shopping.
Now everyone knows how ridiculous it is to go shopping on an empty stomach, unless it's shopping for jeans. Since my cupboards are bare, I turned to the fridge. All that was there to greet me was some sour milk and a moldy bag o salad. Not so delicious in the am. I opened the freezer and realized I had half a bag of frozen french fries. At this point it was about 12:15, which is technically lunchtime. Now personally, I believe that anytime is a good time for some delicious golden french fries, so I poured some oil in a pan and waited for those bad boys to heat. As I'm turning the fries, a splash of scorching oil escapes the pan and thrusts itself upon my spandex covered thigh. My first thought was that the lycra would melt into my flesh and I would be forced to wield a hideous synthetic fiber burn branded upon my leg from now until eternity.
Being the college educated strong black woman that I am, I immediately whipped off those leggings and got some cold water on my leg. Thankfully, it was only a flesh wound. I really thing God is trying to tell me something... so I ordered pizza for dinner.
1 comment:
I liked that you said moldy bag o' salad.
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